Being more present

I’m not usually one for resolutions, but this is one I’m determined to stick with.

This Sunday edition of Consider Yourself Cultured is brought to you by The Bicester Collection.

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My very first memory—ever—is waking up in a mall. In many ways, a good portion of my early childhood was spent there, or in one of the many stores my mom loved to visit. She would push me around in my stroller, stopping to explore anything that caught her eye, before heading to the fitting room where I would give her my opinions on her selects. I would give a little toss of my head for a “yay” or a “nay,” and occasionally, she would take my advice. Other times, she trusted her own intuition, which more often than not proved to be spot-on.

This was around the time of my very first memory. I suppose I’ve always been adventurous when it comes to fashion.

When it came to shopping, my mom didn’t teach me the technical aspects—how to spot quality fabrications, the subtle features that elevate an item beyond just a brand name or price tag. But she did teach me something even more valuable: the importance of trying things. She believed the best way to shop was in person, where you could truly experience the item. That lesson can extend to life itself- the best life is one more grounded in the present- which has not always been the easiest thing for me to do-unless of course if it involves shopping.

I have found that I have a tendency to either wax poetic about the past or obsess over the future. When it comes to being present—say, fully savoring a beautiful dinner at my favorite restaurant or enjoying a stroll through the park—it feels elusive. Perhaps it’s just my nature; the present can feel overwhelming, even daunting. Or maybe it’s a certain anxiety about wasting time, which leads me to constantly plan ahead or replay situations in my mind, searching for ways I could have done better. The irony, though, is that all of those worries and anxieties seem to vanish the moment I step into a store.

Shopping, to me, is a beautiful and exhilarating sport in all its forms. However, I must admit that online shopping has its limitations. There’s always a barrier between you and the product—at least for 2 to 5 business days, if not more. You have to wait, which is, of course, entirely different from shopping in person, where you can immediately see and touch the product and possible go home with said item. Furthermore, stepping into a brick-and-mortar store always feels like entering an entirely different dimension to me. The worries and anxieties about time or the uncertainty of the future fade into the background, and all that matters are the feelings that bubble up seeing the clothes. This is what makes the ability to shop in person feel like such a luxury.

I’ve always appreciated the tactile, immersive nature of in-person shopping—the ability to feel fabrics, chat with sales associates about what’s on the floor, and most importantly, try things on! But it wasn’t until I had the chance to shop in Paris that I truly understood how much of a privilege it is.

On the penultimate day of my Paris trip, Heather and I traveled to La Vallée Village, an off-price luxury shopping village just outside the city (which I’ve mentioned briefly before). La Vallée Village is part of a collection of 12 luxury retail destinations, which include Bicester Village near London, La Roca Village outside of Barcelona, and most recently, Belmont Park Village in New York—which I had the pleasure of visiting at the beginning of December with Ashley. When Heather and I arrived, the first stop was the Apartment, which is a fixture in all of the Collection.

The Apartment serves as the hub for personal stylist services and exclusive offerings like Hands-Free Shopping. This service lets you explore the entire village without the hassle of carrying your purchases; simply leave them at the boutiques, and when you’re ready to leave, all your items are collected and waiting for you.

Shoes I tried on and seriously considered.

Before Heather and I embarked on our shopping extravaganza, we indulged in some light treats and fueled up with caffeine. We honestly expected it to be a quick trip—both of us are fairly discerning shoppers. However, to our surprise, we ended up spending most of the day there. While I had one specific item in mind (and was thrilled to find it!), I kept an open mind, which gave me a fresh perspective as we wandered from store to store.

At one boutique, I seriously considered a heavily embellished skirt from just a few seasons ago, but practicality won out—it would have surely pushed my luggage over the weight limit. In another shop, I was mesmerized by a pair of leather heels with a striking curve that were surprisingly comfortable, but again, the weight limit won.

When I finally found the item I was searching for, I glanced at my phone and was stunned to see it was nearly closing time. Heather and I had spent over four hours shopping, though I’d say a bit of that time was devoted to savoring an espresso and some macarons from the Amorino kiosk.

This is the dress I had been hoping to find—and to my delight, it was there. I must say I was quite a lucky boy that day!

I later learned that La Vallée Village, along with the rest of the collection, places a strong emphasis on in-person experiences. Even during the pandemic, they made the deliberate decision not to pivot to e-commerce, as they didn’t want to lose the human connection that comes with shopping. To this day, if you visit their website, you still have to engage with a person in some capacity to make a purchase. Their dedication to preserving human interaction and investing in tangible spaces and experiences is something I find deeply admirable—and I foresee more businesses adopting this approach in 2025. There’s a growing hunger for experiential shopping, a desire to connect, which I think ties back to this broader idea of being present.

At the start of every new year, there’s a familiar refrain: “New year, new me.” Of course, it’s hyperbolic—you can’t simply erase the past year or years. But there is something about a new year that feels like a clean slate, a chance to approach life with fresh intentions. And even though that Paris trip was three months ago, I keep coming back to it, mainly because of how I felt there. So for 2025, I want to carry forward the feeling I get while shopping: tuning out the noise and fully immersing myself in the moment. My intention is to be more present—with myself, with others, and with life. That’s my wish for you, too—moments of connection, joy, and presence in the year ahead!

Macarons for the road—cheers to a sweet and delightful new year!

xx

JJ

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